My Halloween Costume!!!!!!!!!

HAPPY HALLOWEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!

Despite all the polling, I wasn't too happy with my Halloween costume options. I did a couple prototype Platypus costumes (with leotards, flipper, etc....), but it didn't really look like anything. I knew I could come up with something better.

At first I was thinking that I should be Frankenstein, cause that's pretty Halloween-y. But then I realized that there is a much, much cooler  -Stein, and that if I was going to be any -Stein at all, I should be.........

(Drumroll.....)

EINSTEIN!!!!!!

Here are some interesting facts I learned about Einstein on Wikipedia:

1. He married his first wife, even though she was thought to be too old and physically defective.

2. They had a daughter, Lieserl, born in 1902. Her fate is unknown...

3.He divorced his first wife and married his maternal first cousin, Elsa.

4.He died of internal bleeding caused by an aortic aneurysm.

5. He was a famous scientist.

Here is a video of me as Albert Einstein!!!!!!!!!!!:

I call it EARLSTEIN, THE MOVIE.

I have loved EINSTEIN ever since i can remember, because he is smart, he was really good in that Meg Ryan movie I.Q., and he clearly has a great sense of humor, as evidenced in this picture:

Yes, Albert Einstein is basically the best, and I am definitely going to enjoy being him this Halloween.

So here's to you, Albert Einstein! I will eat a few The Three Muskateers Bars in your honor!

In-GENIUS-ly yours,

Earlstein Watts

What Should Paul be for Halloween?

Any suggestions?

Right now, i'm thinking it would be fun to make him an elephant, but i'm not sure he'd keep the snout on for very long. 

My Mom beefed up my resume :-/

When I told her I don't actually have any pet care experience. She told me Neopets count.

:-/

A Haiku (BITE ME, annonymous haiku hating commentor!)

Reached a conclusion, guys.

A Haiku

If you want a job

Or if you want a boyfriend

Don't look on Craigslist.

Resigned,

E.E. Watts

They Earlove me! They really Earlove me!

Guess what I got in the mail today?!?!?!

I LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE it. I love love love love LOVE it. Even though it is pink. (my favorite hue is Burnt Sienna, which is a lovely mix of my two favorite colors, orange and brown.)

I especially love that Bradney was also included in the collage. Although I suppose somebody besides him added that thought bubble. (but just in case he actually thought that: you can have my earlovin anytime, B) 

It is nice to know that even though I don't have many friends where I live (four, if you count Ish, My Mom, Trey, and my cat Paul), I have friends out there in the cyber world.

Warmed,

Early

P.S. this was really great guys....anyone else want to send me their picture? I'll post it!

Have you ever considered the exciting world of secretarial administration?

....yeah. me neither. 

My mom made an appointment for me to see a Career Counselor. The career counselor said to make up a list of career goals. I told her i didn't have any. She told me to write down the things I wanted to be when I grew up, and that she would help me develop those interests into a fulfilling career path.

FIVE THINGS I WANTED TO BE WHEN I GREW UP

1. A ballerina, because the arches of my feet have abnormal hypersupination, meaning i wouldn't even need pointe shoes.

2. An aquanaut 

3. The President of the United States (this one i'm actually still considering.)

4. Mrs.Guggandler my next door neighbor from when I was seven until I was thirteen but only before she tripped on the stairs going up to her porch and hit her head on the birdfeeder.

5. An ear, nose and throat doctor so i could self-diagnose better.

So yeah, I'll be very interested to see what this Career Counselor comes up with for me. 

Skeptically,

Earlene

This is harder than I thought.

DID YOU KNOW.....

                         That there are actually few jobs on craigslist for the inexperienced young worker in her early 20s, besides being an egg donor for a "loving couple"?

Ugh, today has been rough, guys, it's been really rough. First of all, Mom woke me up at 10:30 am (!!!!!!!!) to remind me to work on my resume. So I did, and twenty minutes later, I had this:

Can you guys read that? Is it too small? Well, whatever, you get the gist.

I spent the rest of my day sending my resume out to jobs that seemed appropriate, including being a companion for an elderly woman in a nursery home, and dog walking. Though I'm not feeling too confident about either of those options, because old people tend to hate me, and I tend to hate dogs.

The ONE really COOL COOL COOL job that I came across on craigslist was a job to be a PLAINCLOTHES STORE DETECTIVE, NO EXPERIENCE NECESSARY, WILL TRAIN. Doesn't that sound great? Imagine me, Earlene Watts, working undercover at Wet Seal or something and catching all the robbers! Do you think I would get a badge? What about a gun?

Anyway I really hope that comes through for me.

Otherwise, I wonder if mom would let being a surrogate count as having a job....

Pensively,

Earlene