Tuesday, January 6, 2009

Back from my Ashram.

Hi, guys.

Sorry for the lack of posts. I decided to go on an Ashram to the Desert. An Ashram is where you go to live in peace and tranquility in nature. I really needed some peace and tranquility after my breakup with Carl (his breakup with me???), especially since I had so many huge life decisions to make.

I WANTED to go all the way to the desert in India, except I was afraid of the gastrointestinal ramifications of such a voyage.

So instead I went to IndiO, which in a desert two hours from LA.
I stayed at a Motel Six and it was very tranquil, except for one disturbing altercation that took place in the parking lot at 4 am. 

During the day, I would go out into the desert and find a nice spot without any beer cans or bullet shells on the ground, and meditate/read O Magazine about My Best Life.

It was very soothing.


AAAAAANYWAY.

Now I'm back, and I've made a very important decision:

I am GOING TO NEW YORK ANYWAY! 

I am going to New York, and I'm going to get a FABULOUS job, and make friends with WHITNEY and OLIVIA PALERMO (As one commenter presciently suggested), and I'll start dating someone named WALTER BOBBY, and then one day I will run into Carl and he'll be like "Wow, Earlene, your life is so much better than mine because since we broke up I lost my job and my hair and four toes from my right foot..." and I'll be like "Whoa, THAT sucks...." and then turn back to Walter Bobby and start making out furiously.

A stupid, quiverful GUY should never stand between a girl and her DREAM.

Resolutely,
E. Watts

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Early!
What the heck was Carl thinking? What a jerk. I know everyone says this sort of thing, but in my opinion you're better off. I think Carl might be using "quiverful" as a euphamism for something else (if you know what I mean). Did he give you a reason? did I miss the post? I am so glad you are going to New York anyway. You will rock that town.

I am glad you took some time to find your spiritual center. I have historic familial roots in Indio. My great grandfather was on the committe to formally incorporate Indio into a city. Some poeple say that he was doing is civic duty, but my family suspects he was trying to insure the whorehouse renting the upstairs of his pharmacy could continue to operate unmolested (so to speak). I come from good pioneer stock.

Love Jill

Anonymous said...

I hope to see you on Gossip Girl... The only thing more dramatic than that show is your life. Maybe you can start dating Ed Westwick to make that asshole Carl jealous.